Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Return From the.... Shed

First and foremost, I believe it is important for me to say, "sorry". I have been gone a very long time and have let down the 3 people out there that actual read my blog. I have been extremely busy with school and trying to find a new job. ok, that's not the point, just the intro.

As some of you know, I hunt for about 5 days every fall. My wife , Gibson and myself take a trip to the magical wonderland of McBain, if you have been there I am sure you can sense my sarcasm. Never-the-less, I enjoy my time there and I always anticipate bagging a buck.

This year my father in law was gracious enough to allow me to use his deer blind. I love using his blind because it has plenty of room and a nice warm space heater. As I enjoyed the artificial warmth of propane against my legs, I looked out over the snowy tundra. With every sweeping glance I hoped to see two huge bucks interlocked in battle. Instead I sat there and didn't see a dang thing. It was getting dark, so I started to gather my things when out of the corner of my eye I saw a buck nibbling on the bate pile. I stopped what I was doing, grabbed my trusty British 303 from WWII, and assumed the position. I opened the window of the blind so I could take aim at the beast. I was much too tall for the window so I had to bend over in a very awkward position. I wanted to get down on one knee but the heater that was once my friend is now a thorn in my side. I didn't want to chance moving the propane tank and startle the deer, so I just bent over at the waist and tried to get a decent shot off. With my knees shaking and my back twisted in a way that rivaled scoliosis, I nestled my eye up to the scope. I had the buck in my cross-hairs for spilt seconds at a time. The buck was about 200yrds away and I couldn't keep the barrel of the rifle steady. I knew what I had to do, take the shot as the cross-hairs of the scope passed by the breast of the buck, steady or not, here I come. BANG, the shot startled me because there is so much play in the trigger of this old rifle, I can never tell when exactly the gun will fire. I see two deer run off, did I get it? Where did it go? I quickly jump out of the blind and start to track the deer. The deer was too far to run after on foot so I took my father in law's truck across a creek to the bate pile. When I got to the bate pile I didn't see any blood, did I miss? Wait, there's a spot of blood right there on the ground. I felt something warm and thick streaming down my face. The blood I found was from my foreheard. The kick back from the rifle drove the scope right into my forehead, leaving an inch gash right between my eyes. Feeling like a complete turd, I hopped in the truck and headed for home.

I didn't have to drive far, I was in my in laws back yard. I pull the truck around and made my way up the drive-way. As I approach the garage I push on the brakes and nothing. The truck didn't jerk or slow down at all. NO BRAKES. I pushed the pedal to the floor still nothing. I am headed straight for the house with nothing but the side of the garage to slow me down. I experience horrifying pictures of the truck ending up in the living room. I braced myself for impact. Here we go. CRASH! I run directly into the side of the garage. It sounded as though an explosion went off. Kasey, Beth, and Kaitlyn all came running out of the house as though a meteor landed in their front yard. I put the truck in park and got out to assess the damage. Some how the truck only busted a few panels of siding, no serious damage. My "married into" family looked at me as though I just shot their dog. There I was, blood running down my face, my feet muddy to my knees, looking like I just hit their garage, because I did.
I started to stutter, there was nothing I could say to explain what just happened.

my mother in law started to give me the third degree before I could tell her the brake went out, as though she would believe it any way. Turns out, when I went through the creek the water froze around the discs and would not allow the brake pads to engage. Result, me hitting the garage with great force.

I was the laughing stock of McBain for that weekend. For a few different reasons, one, missing the deer, two, the nice Harry Potter scare on my fore-head, and three, deciding the garage was more like a speed bump.

Thank you for taking a look at, yet another, episode in my life.